The Words We Speak Shape Our Lives More Than We Can Imagine
I preached the following sermon in September, 2006. The setting was in a church in Marshall, Texas.
Hear the Word of the Lord
Psalm 19 (King James Version)
1The heavens declare the glory of God; and the firmament sheweth his handywork.
2Day unto day uttereth speech, and night unto night sheweth knowledge.
3There is no speech nor language, where their voice is not heard.
4Their line is gone out through all the earth, and their words to the end of the world. In them hath he set a tabernacle for the sun,
5Which is as a bridegroom coming out of his chamber, and rejoiceth as a strong man to run a race.
6His going forth is from the end of the heaven, and his circuit unto the ends of it: and there is nothing hid from the heat thereof.
7The law of the LORD is perfect, converting the soul: the testimony of the LORD is sure, making wise the simple.
8The statutes of the LORD are right, rejoicing the heart: the commandment of the LORD is pure, enlightening the eyes.
9The fear of the LORD is clean, enduring for ever: the judgments of the LORD are true and righteous altogether.
10More to be desired are they than gold, yea, than much fine gold: sweeter also than honey and the honeycomb.
11Moreover by them is thy servant warned: and in keeping of them there is great reward.
12Who can understand his errors? cleanse thou me from secret faults.
13Keep back thy servant also from presumptuous sins; let them not have dominion over me: then shall I be upright, and I shall be innocent from the great transgression.
14Let the words of my mouth, and the meditation of my heart, be acceptable in thy sight, O LORD, my strength, and my redeemer.
James 3:1-12 (King James Version)
1My brethren, be not many masters, knowing that we shall receive the greater condemnation.
2For in many things we offend all. If any man offend not in word, the same is a perfect man, and able also to bridle the whole body.
3Behold, we put bits in the horses' mouths, that they may obey us; and we turn about their whole body.
4Behold also the ships, which though they be so great, and are driven of fierce winds, yet are they turned about with a very small helm, whithersoever the governor listeth.
5Even so the tongue is a little member, and boasteth great things. Behold, how great a matter a little fire kindleth!
6And the tongue is a fire, a world of iniquity: so is the tongue among our members, that it defileth the whole body, and setteth on fire the course of nature; and it is set on fire of hell.
7For every kind of beasts, and of birds, and of serpents, and of things in the sea, is tamed, and hath been tamed of mankind:
8But the tongue can no man tame; it is an unruly evil, full of deadly poison.
9Therewith bless we God, even the Father; and therewith curse we men, which are made after the similitude of God.
10Out of the same mouth proceedeth blessing and cursing. My brethren, these things ought not so to be.
11Doth a fountain send forth at the same place sweet water and bitter?
12Can the fig tree, my brethren, bear olive berries? either a vine, figs? so can no fountain both yield salt water and fresh.
The Sermon
Before I begin this message, I would like to state unequivocally, that the scriptures we are using today are right from the lectionary for the week so I have not chosen this topic because I have any sense that there is anyone in this house this morning who in any way might be needing a lesson such as this, or that anyone here might have any kind of a problem with one’s mouth, or words, or attitude. It is simply a matter of taking a group of scriptures from the recommended list and making a Bible lesson from them. However, if anyone here does find that he or she has a need to be reminded of these principles, then we will have done a good thing. Sometimes the Holy Spirit sees a need that may not be obvious to the casual observer and tends to orchestrate a way to take care of it.
James, the Lord’s brother, is right, of course. We can use our tongue much like a sword fighter uses his weapon—to cut, to slice, to separate, to remove, to devastate. James sees both sides, that the words we speak can hurt or they can heal, and he is cautioning his audience--those early Christians who had just come from a world where there were few restraints to hurtful words—to understand this principle, and use it wisely instead of unwisely, to bless and not curse, to build up and not put down.
Now, I doubt that there is anyone sitting here this morning that does not know this. But my job is to “stir you up” to use the words of Peter and Paul, so that we will be reminded of our behavior when it turns negative and harmful to both ourselves and others.
So, James, in his discourse about the tongue is right, but I will disagree with him on one point. Can I do that? Maybe it is a matter of interpretation, but he states that we can tame ships, horses and all kinds of animals, but cannot tame our own tongue! Or, to put it another way, he states that no one can control their own speech. You may remember the comic Flip Wilson, who always got a laugh with the line, “the devil made me do it.” There is probably some truth in that concept, but I would rather believe that we have a choice about whether to listen to and succumb to the devil’s suggestions, or to resist him, as James in a later chapter admonishes. Maybe I don’t disagree with James after all, maybe it is next to impossible for us to always keep our tongue in check, but, with God, all things are possible! The good news is that help is available! Help is just a prayer away.
What does Jesus say about this issue?
In the 12th chapter of Matthew about verse 35, Jesus says: “A good man out of the good treasure of the heart bringeth forth good things: and an evil man out of the evil treasure bringeth forth evil things. But I say unto you, That every idle word that men shall speak, they shall give account thereof in the day of judgment. For by thy words thou shalt be justified, and by thy words thou shalt be condemned.”
This particular saying is full of ideas that need our attention: the concept of a good man and an evil man (perhaps woman might go here just as well); the idea of being justified, made righteous, by our words or, on the other hand, condemned by our own words? But this could be a topic for another day. I would like for you to just look at one aspect for now. The idea, concept, teaching that I am going to be held accountable, and I suppose that that accounting will be required at the throne at the last great day.
I am going to be held accountable for every, not just a few, not just the worst ones, but every one, every word I speak that is unproductive, could we read that negative, not doing any good, maybe even doing harm, not building up, maybe even tearing down?
Now, please listen carefully, because I do not want to be misquoted here. This statement about us being held accountable for every idle, non-productive and unprofitable word that we speak is written in my Bible in red type, these are the very words of Jesus.
Maybe this is what James meant in his first chapter, verse 19 when he cautioned us to be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath—listen carefully, think about what we are going to say, measure our words, as Jesus said in another place—let your yes, mean yes and your no mean no—and then if we are going to be angry at someone for what they said or did, let’s not rush into a rage, but lets think about it awhile before acting.
I’ve got some relatives. I guess everyone has a few. One or two in particular, can call on the phone and before you get out your “hello, how are you? They have launched into a verbal tirade all about some event, or happening that they did not like, including all the minute details of he said, I said, etc. etc., etc., never stopping for a breath for four or five minutes at a time. And if, you dare to try to say something about your own situation, they can turn the conversation right back to themselves so fast.
I confess, I just do not have the verbal skills to match that kind of challenge. I would like to be able to warn them, I’d like to read Matthew 12: 36 to them, but they won’t be still long enough to hear it.
Jesus had a lot to say about saying things and we do not have the time to consider them all this morning. But, there is another statement that we might mention in passing, in Matthew again, chapter 15, verse 11, he states that is not what goes in to the mouth, as in food or how it is prepared or whether one puts the food in with unwashed hands, but more importantly, it is what comes out, in speech, that can defile us, that can make us dirty, that can contaminate us and make us sick spiritually.
Folks who have dedicated their lives to the study of human beings, their thought patterns, behaviors and how they interact with others, those who have studied psychology and sociology have discovered a lot of stuff about how we act and why. Many times as we discover these things, we can see that this use of the scientific method has brought us to the same conclusions that we find in the scriptures.
A sociologist, Robert Merton back in the 50s came up with the concept of the self-fulfilling prophesy, where upon, a statement is made which may initially be false, but the statement itself evokes behavior, in the individual speaking and also in those who are influenced by the hearing of it, that brings about its becoming true.
Numerous scientific studies have been done that demonstrate the truth of this concept such as the classic one at Harvard in 1968, with the classroom teachers in two groups. The teachers were told that one group of students were very bright and intelligent, and another group were going to be low achievers, even though the actual intelligence and ability of the students were random, Results indicated that the students performed to the level the teachers were told to expect. So, the students acted and reacted to the clues, speech patterns and the words of the teachers, attitudes and words, driven by what they were told to expect and not necessarily by reality.
Another idea along this line is that of what the social scientists call self talk. We tend to act and react upon information that reaches our brains. That information can come from some outside source, like listening to the words of a speaker, like you are doing right now, or, hearing the words from our own vocal system. This happens automatically. And it works whether the information is positive or negative. If we listen to negative information, or we say negative things then we are going to act accordingly, which will bring about negative results. Thus, we see the results of both self talk and self fulfilling prophesy at work in a negative way.
I think Jesus must have had this in mind when he admonishes us as recorded in Matthew the sixth chapter, not to worry about what we need, for that is a sign of little faith and particularly do not go around wondering to ourselves:
“O you of little faith? Therefore do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ and on down, he promises us that if we seek the kingdom first, all these things will be provided. I guess the interpretation here would be that we have the ability to derail that promise by our words. We can talk our self right out of our blessings.
A lot of our humor today is negativism: somebody says, hey, “I’m so broke, I can’t pay attention, or “the way my luck has been lately, when my ship comes in, I’ll be at the airport.” In light of what we have just discussed, is this not negative self talk and self fulfilling prophesy which will likely lead to its stated result?
There is a very interesting story, in the book of Genesis. It is the story of the tower of Babel, perhaps from were we get the term Babylon, the ruins of that city can be found on the outskirts of Bagdad, Iraq.
Anyway, you can find the story in the beginning of the eleventh chapter of Genesis. Briefly, there was a group of folks who all spoke the same language, and they had evidently come to an agreement to build a tower “who’s top would be in the heavens” so that they could make a name for themselves. Their particular sin is not really clear, other than they were self seeking and had evidently left God out of their plans.
Whatever the reason, God said that they are one, unified in purpose, and they all speak the same language, they were able to understand each other, and God admits that there is nothing that can stop them from their purpose.
Couple this with the idea in the creation story that we, mankind, are created in the very image of God. One of God’s outstanding abilities is His ability to speak the things that are not into existence. The Bible calls this faith, and this faith is exercised by speaking. God said, for example, “let there be light” and light came. So, logically, if God is able to create with his words and He created man in His image, man must have some similar characteristics. This becomes a little clearer, when we read that God admitted here in this passabge, that his men, once they were agreed on a purpose and could communicate with each other, would succeed in their endeavor. The final argument here is the fix that God put in to stop them, and perhaps He had and greater purpose, as well. However, He confounded, confused, added meanings and nuances to their language so that free and easy communication was no longer possible and they thus could not carry out their purposes.
So, what can we get out of all this? What can we take home with us?
The ability to speak in a language, to be able to communicate with each other, the ability to understand each other’s thoughts (sometimes) is uniquely human. This ability is God given and it is powerful. Our speech is capable of changing, controlling and ordering our world. Our speech, our words are capable of helping or harming.
The admonitions of scripture, God’s rules, if you will, are really to help us live better, freer, more enjoyable lives. If we are restrained by God’s rules, the purpose of the restraint is to keep us from harm.
So, God’s way is really, in the long run, the best way. Our lives will be much more pleasant and we will find ourselves getting along with each other better when we monitor our speech patterns, when we consciously build others up, rather than tear down.
I have a friend. He had a habit of ragging about his wife. She was this and she was that, She was never much good. He persistently did this in public, and I suppose put her down in private as well. They’re divorced.
I knew a preacher who just could not please his congregation, they were never happy with him, he in turn would just rake them over the coals every Sunday and would talk about how bad they were to his fellows at the district meetings. He’s now selling insurance. We could go on with this, but hopefully you get the picture. If we want a better life, if we want a better way, try God’s way.
I know a married couple. They were having trouble getting along. They were at cross purposes. They were in financial difficulty. They blamed each other for mistakes and mismanagement. They were not very involved in church activities, they were not giving of their meager means. The home was not always a happy place to be. And then, somehow, something changed their attitudes!
They begin to pray together, he thanking God for his wife and she thanking God for her husband, and telling the Father in heaven, about all the good things that he did for her and he telling Him what a great person his wife was. They purposed to just start to get back into church, to just start to share a little bit of their meager resources with the church. They admitted regularly to each other of their love. They quit the blame game and both took responsibility to work together to get through their problems. There is happiness in this home now. Their financial picture is much better now They have been married now fro a long time.
They chose God’s way.
Closing Prayer (adapted from Psalm 19)
Father, your law is perfect, it restores us; your testimony is sure, it makes the wise simple. Your precepts , Oh Lord, are right, they make our hearts rejoice. Your ordinances are true and righteous altogether and are more to be desired than gold, even than much fine gold; they are sweeter also than honey and the drippings from the honeycomb and by them we are warned and instructed; and in keeping them there is great reward. Who of us, Oh Lord, can discern his lapses and errors? Clear us from hidden and unconscious faults. Keep us back also from presumptuous sins; let them not have dominion over us! Then shall we be blameless, and we shall be innocent and clear of great transgression. And, let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in Your sight, O Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer. For we ask these things in the precious and the powerful name of Jesus.
Amen.
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